P58: Prioritizing Personal Resilience: A Leadership Reset for Women
- Angela E. Batista, Ed.D.
- 14 hours ago
- 6 min read
A few years ago, I experienced a moment that changed everything. As I walked down the hallway of my hotel room, I caught my reflection in a mirror, and it told a story I didn’t want anyone else to know. I looked tired, not just physically exhausted but also emotionally. I had been carrying too much for too long.
As I stood in a hotel conference room preparing to facilitate a retreat for a leadership team navigating upheaval, I couldn’t help but think about all that I was holding: traveling fatigue, upcoming deadlines, nonstop emails, client prep that was looming, and the full weight of life happening at home with my family. I felt a familiar truth rising: I was leading others through resilience without giving myself permission to slow down, reconnect, and restore. At that moment, I realized I was surviving, not thriving.
That moment became an immediate turning point. I recognized resilience isn’t built by pushing harder. True resilience, especially for women, comes from the discipline of pausing, caring for ourselves, and reclaiming the energy we so often give away.
Context: Why This Matters More Than Ever
Women leaders carry a disproportionate share of emotional labor, caregiving demands, and invisible responsibilities. Add in leadership roles, workplace expectations, and the mental load of navigating uncertainty, and the result is predictable: exhaustion, frustration, and diminished joy.
The problem isn’t that women lack resilience. Women lead families, workplaces, communities, and institutions with extraordinary strength. The issue is that our resilience is often expected rather than supported. And in times of political, economic, or personal stability, women often take on even more. This blog is designed to interrupt that cycle. It blends leadership, wellbeing, and transformation, starting with a simple question:
What if resilience isn’t about endurance, but about intentional restoration?
The women I work with, and I want to move beyond endurance to intentional restoration. Drawing on insights from our Transformation by Design (TBD) purposeful approach to leadership, this month’s blog centers on women, leaders, caregivers, creators, and professionals who deserve space to reset and rebuild.
Four Pathways to Personal Resilience
These four pathways offer a grounded, practical approach to reclaiming your energy and strengthening your resilience. Each pathway includes practices inspired by the tools in the uploaded resources and expanded through the TBD lens.
1. Reclaiming Time and Energy: Women often feel they’re juggling multiple responsibilities: caregiving, work, relationships, and household responsibilities. Many days are spent serving others, leaving little room for personal restoration. Resilience requires space, not hours of uninterrupted quiet. Space you can claim in tiny, intentional moments.
What this looks like in practice:
Use waiting time, in the car, between meetings, in lines, as built-in “pause moments” to breathe, stretch, or read something nourishing.
Block time on your calendar for yourself exactly as you would for a client, and keep the appointment.
Learn to say “not today” without guilt. Boundaries aren’t barriers; they protect your energy and your well-being.
Find a weekly ritual that returns you to yourself: a solo coffee, a quiet drive, a walk, a moment in nature.
These are not indulgences. These are investments in your resilience.
2. Honoring Your Limits Without Apology: Many women struggle with the fear that saying no or “I need space” might be met with judgment or disappointment. But overextension erodes our emotional bandwidth and undermines our effectiveness as leaders.
Recognizing your limits is an act of leadership.
Resilient women:
Know that “no” is a full sentence.
Delegate without guilt.
Trust others to step in instead of carrying it all.
Release the belief that rest is a luxury. It's a necessity.
Feeling worn down or overwhelmed is not a personal failing; it is a signal.
A signal to reset, reorganize, and reclaim capacity.
3. Rebuilding Joy in Difficult Seasons
Joy can feel distant in hard times, yet it’s in those moments that joy becomes a lifeline. Not forced positivity. Not pretending everything is fine. But the small, honest joys that remind you of your humanity and your hope.
What this can look like:
Surround yourself with people who lift your spirit and help you breathe easier. Strong support systems matter most during difficult seasons.
Limit your exposure to negative voices, both in others and in yourself.
Create connections in ways that are accessible right now: a video call, a handwritten note, or a brief conversation with someone who sees you.
Remember: nothing is permanent. What feels overwhelming today will evolve, soften, or eventually pass.
Joy is not a luxury. Joy is nourishment. It strengthens your capacity to keep showing up.
4. Growing Your Resilience Muscle
Resilience is not a fixed trait; it’s a practice. A dynamic skill that strengthens through intention.
Growing your resilience might mean:
Accepting what you cannot control, while taking action on what you can.
Staying grounded in what’s true right now, rather than forecasting worst-case scenarios.
Practicing self-compassion rather than self-criticism.
Finding an internal center of stability so that external chaos doesn’t dictate your emotional state.
Life is full of highs and lows, and your strength lies in how you respond
to each moment. Resilience grows from this clarity.
Personal Leadership Reflection: A Lesson in Letting Go
I once coached a woman executive who, like many of us, carried her strength like armor. She managed a large team, oversaw critical projects, and held everything together at home, yet she confessed something quietly during one of our sessions:
“I haven't sat alone in silence for months.”
Her days were filled from sunrise to lateat night. When she finally paused long enough to breathe, she realized she had built a life that didn’t include space for her own restoration. Not due to a lack of discipline, but because the world had conditioned her to believe her value was tied to her output.
Together, we experimented with simple practices: five minutes of morning quiet, a weekly solo walk, and one boundary-setting conversation. Two months later, she said, “I feel myself again.”
That is resilience. Not bouncing back. It’s coming home to yourself.
Think for a moment:
Where are you pushing yourself beyond capacity?
What small practice could help you return to your center?
How would your leadership shift if you felt replenished instead of depleted?
Weekly Reset Practice: Build Your Resilience Ritual
Rather than piling on more tasks, try a weekly reset ritual, 10 to 20 minutes of intentional self-reflection.
Choose one of the following:
The Energy Audit
Ask yourself:
What energized me this week?
What drained me?
What do I need to adjust to feel supported next week?
The Boundary Check
Identify one boundary that needs strengthening.
Script the language you’ll use: “Right now, I don’t have the capacity to take this on.”
The Joy Scan
List three small joys from your week, moments you want to remember.
Let them remind you that joy is still present, even in complexity.
The “Me Time” Recommitment
Schedule one non-negotiable moment for yourself next week, and honor it the way you honor your commitments to others.
These resets don’t take long. But their impact is cumulative.
Conclusion: Resilience by Design, Not by Default
Resilience is not what you endure; it’s what you choose to nurture. It’s the clarity to honor your limits, the courage to reclaim your time, and the commitment to center your own joy and wellbeing.
As women in leadership roles, we often hold worlds together. But we deserve to be held, too, by our own intentional practices, by our communities, and by environments that affirm our humanity.
Designing your resilience is designing your life. And when you thrive,
everyone around you benefits.
Call to Action
This week, choose one resilience practice and commit to it: a boundary, a joy ritual, a moment of silence, or a reclaimed piece of your day.
Then spend five minutes journaling:
What changed when I centered myself this week?
How did reclaiming even a small moment of care strengthen my clarity, energy, or leadership?
At TBD, we believe resilience is not a personal luxury; it is a leadership responsibility. And women deserve spaces that sustain them, not just demand from them. Let’s create those spaces, one intentional pause at a time.